Fashion Victims
I ride the bus to and from work every day, and I work in a busy metropolitan hospital, and I see hundreds of people every day. I have recently noticed a few absolutely idiotic fashion trends in the last few months.
First off, you're going to look at me in my completely un-trendy clothes and think, "How can she judge fashion? She dresses like crap." You'd be right. I do dress like crap. I hate my clothes. All of them. I dress the way I do because there is only one store in Edinburgh that sells clothes in my size, and there are only a few things at that store that I can afford. So I'm limited by my own lack of money and the UK's cultural intolerance of fat people. So I observe fashion from the outside. I'm like a double-amputee ballet fan. I enjoy it, but I can't participate.
Right now there are some fashion trends I hate. The first thing that I hate is hip-huggers. They look good on no one. All over the streets, there are girls wearing hip huggers so tight that they cut the fat on their hips into 2 hideous rolls, above and below the waistline. The skinniest girls look like fat cows in these trousers. They add 20 pounds to anyone dumb enough to wear them. Manufacturers: please stop making them. People: please stop buying them. The answer to that timeless question is, "Yes, those jeans most certainly do make you look fat."
The other trend I hate is random patches of bleached hair. Women will bleach a few chunks of hair, or even worse, men with short hair will bleach spots and patterns onto their heads. It doesn't look natural. It doesn't look good. In fact, it looks like there is a horrible vitiligo epidemic in Edinburgh. Maybe the bleach has eaten into their brains, and that's why they think the hip-huggers look good.
The only bright spot in the fashion scene here is that as the days get shorter and the air grows colder, I am subjected to fewer and fewer pairs of giant windscreen-sized Paris Hilton sunglasses. Whenever I see a girl wearing those, my gut reaction is to just punch her in the head for being a brainless fashion victim. But I can't do that because if I assaulted every brainless fashion victim in this country, my hands would become very bruised and sore in short order.
Alana
